MY PROFILE -- by Susan B. Anthony, I mean Jameson.

The Triangle Series began, as so many good things do, with a kiss.

When I was a freshman in college -- more years ago than I care to remember -- I fell in love with a young man. I'll call him Stuart, although that's nothing like his name. Stuart liked so many of the same things I did -- music, the Crimson Tide, sad movies. He was incredibly bright and compassionate, and we could talk for hours. I thought we were perfect for each other.

We might have been, if he had been straight.

Stuart had fought hard to change what he was, but eventually he faced the truth, with a calm courage that still humbles me. This was more than 25 years ago, and in the Deep South. Coming out at that time and in that place was an incredibly brave act.

But it still broke my heart when he told me.

I cried for days. I still loved him, and I knew that he still loved me. I also knew it was hopeless. But in spite of that, he still wanted to be with me, and I wanted to be with him. He still came to my dorm to see me, and when he left me for the evening, he still kissed me goodnight.

After a while, I began dating again, and soon I had a new boyfriend. I didn't talk about him much around Stuart, because it really didn't seem to have anything to do with our friendship.

Summer came, and my new boyfriend and I kept in close touch. We even discussed marriage. When fall came, I returned to school, eager to see my boyfriend and my other friends, and especially Stuart.

I got my wish. Stuart came to my room almost as soon as I arrived. We hugged, and I got out my guitar, and we played and sang together.

Then my boyfriend arrived. He said hello to Stuart, then sat on the bed next to me and put his arm around me.

Stuart looked at me for a long, long time without saying anything. Then he got up, and he smiled, and said he'd see me later.

He kissed me goodbye, and he left. I never saw him again.

When it came time to register for classes, I discovered that I'd lost my scholarship. I went home, transferred to another school and resumed my studies.

I saw my boyfriend again, although the relationship didn't survive the separation.

I got married a few years later -- disastrously, as you may discern if you read "The Fifth Side of the Triangle." I'm happily re-married now, with five children (my husband's and my own), and I no longer grieve for that boyfriend or that first marriage.

But I still grieve over losing Stuart. I have tried without success to find him. I have never forgotten him, or his kiss, or his struggles to adjust to a world that clearly didn't want him the way he was.

It was Stuart, and that kiss -- that last, sweet kiss -- that inspired me to write the Triangle series. I wanted to pay tribute to Stuart and the love we had for each other -- love that survived even though he was gay and I was straight. I decided to put Mulder and Scully in that situation and see how the MSR would survive.

I never doubted that it would.

I'm a firm believer in the MSR, and I believe slash writers ignore or minimize it at their peril. I also believe that Mulder dislikes Krycek far too firmly to fall in love with him. (Sorry, Isa and other M/K fans -- I still read those stories, but I do have to suspend my disbelief!)

Now Skinner, I could believe -- but Skinner has such a powerful personality that he tends to overwhelm any story he's in. It's one of the reasons I like him. It's also the reason he wouldn't work as Mulder's love interest in this series -- I wanted the MSR to remain the primary relationship.

That's why we have Lt. Cmdr. Daniel Reilly, M.D., USN, who loves Mulder deeply but for obvious reasons cannot be with him publicly. Daniel bears a lot of the burden of guilt and homophobia in this story, mostly because of his military background, but he bears that burden bravely -- his behavior based almost exactly on Stuart's courage so many years ago.

Daniel is entirely my own invention. I never planned that he would be as big a part of the story as he's become, but that's what happens when you get to create a man out of whole cloth: You fall in love with him, and I can honestly say that's how I feel about Daniel. I hope I have succeeded in portraying that love through Mulder's eyes, and through Scully's.

I had also intended that this should be a real triangle, with only three sides, but once I got going, I couldn't stop. I wanted to develop this triangle further, and inject a little humor, so Bill Scully became the fourth side of the triangle -- which is also the title of one of my favorite Ellery Queen novels.

The fifth side came to be when I began to deal, in a way I never had before, with the physical and emotional abuse of my first marriage. I wanted people to understand how it is that a woman can get into a relationship like that, and how hard it can be to leave. I've been told that I accomplished the near-impossible task I set for myself: to make Dana Scully a believable victim of domestic abuse.

The sixth side, just completed, was done at the request of a young woman I know who doesn't care about marrying a multi-millionaire; she'd settle for being able to marry the woman she loves.

The seventh side is in progress, and is mostly done in response to Isa's wish for Mulder and Daniel to deal with Skinner and Krycek -- and for me to explain the events of "3" in a universe where Mulder is exclusively gay.

So here's the Triangle series, dedicated to Stuart, and to my many other gay friends and relatives. I love you all.